“The Hardest Part” by Alexander 23, contributed by Sofia Detjen (2025)
For my Scalar post I chose the song “The Hardest Part” by Alexander 23. For someone experiencing loss, this song can serve as a cathartic release and a validation of their pain. Grief often comes with guilt, and I think the lyrics really get at the feeling of wishing you had reached out more. The song’s honesty about missed chances reassures listeners that these feelings are universal and are not failures. One of the main messages is “The hardest part of gettin' old / Is that some people that you love don’t.” This puts words to the enduring ache of outliving someone, a truth that many struggle to articulate. It speaks especially to youth who are beginning to age and experience a loss of an old friend.
I think music like this helps grievers feel less alone in their sorrow, offering a space where their emotions are reflected back without judgment. It doesn’t provide answers, but it does say, “I see you. This hurts, and you’re not wrong for feeling it.” For those drowning in the unspeakable, songs like this can be a lifeline—proof that even in the sad moments, someone else has been there, too.