Resources for Loss

Pose (TV series), contributed by Katherine Qian

The TV show "POSE" can be viewed on Netflix. It tells the story of gay and transgender people of color in 1980s New York responding to a lot of different types of loss, a lot of which are caused by social exclusion and the AIDS crisis. It starts off with a boy getting kicked out of his home by his parents and explores the tremendous grief that came with AIDS and being diagnosed with it or watching so many of your loved ones die from it.

I thought this would be a very good addition considering we talked about disenfranchised loss and because it shows how people might respond to death on such a large scale. For example, one character responds to being consoled and told to "feel better" about the death of his lover like this:

"I've buried more friends in the last year than any of you can count! And when it's all over who knows how many of us will be left? So I don't need a bunch of immature 20-somethings, who just figured out how to wipe their own a**es telling me how to act or feel! When y'all have walked a mile in my shoes, y'all come find me."

-- Pray Tell (Billy Porter), POSE Season 1 2018

There is even a segment that explores the complicated death of a parent who shunned her child for being transgender. In the end, Pose was a heartbreaking but heartwarming show that I found very moving and inspiring in the way that it showed the power of family (blood family or chosen family) to triumph against all odds.

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